How to Argue Effectively
All couples, no matter how new, old or in-between, fight. But no couple fights in the same way. Arguing is not necessarily about getting your way, but many people treat it that way. Here are a few pointers on fighting fair. First, examine your motives for fighting. Do you fight with the expectation of coming to a resolution, or do you fight in the spirit of getting even, winning or controlling your mate? Your relationship shouldn't be competitive - approach a disagreement with the desire to resolve the situation amicably. Next, choose the venue carefully. If you're around family - particularly children - then it's best to wait to resolve the issue in private. It's occasionally OK for kids to see their parents fight - if it's done in the right way. If you know things are going to get heated, then it's best to save it until after the kids go to bed. Keep the discussion in the present. It adds insult to injury when one partner brings up the other's shortcomings from the past.