4 Reasons to Dump Him

Obviously, if the guy is beating you or cheating on you, he has to go. As for the rest of it, enjoy your 12 cats in your old age. Votes: +5

Enjoyed the comments on this forum. I am a male who has been married three times. I freely admit that the first marriage failing was almost totaly my fault. The first time I married too early but thank god had two children from the marriage. The second one, I failed to realize how strong my wife really was and still is. I have reconciled with her and admitted she was my biggest mistake.... When I divorced her. By the time of my third marriage, I felt I had learned all the lessons needed to make a succesful marriage. I was very supportive, caring and nurturing to my wife. I was on the road a great deal in my job, but when I came home I helped with the chores of cleaning house, maintaining the yard and of course the vehicles. I did this for two reasons. One because she had to do this by herself when I was on the road and two, so we could have more quality time together while I was home. But even with all this, it was not enough. She told me she wanted a divorce. I to this day feel that she was having an affair with someone at her work. My daughter and her are still best of friends, but I have found it hard to talk to her because of the damage she did to me by divorcing me.

My whole point is this comment is that even if you treat your spouse exactly as you would want to be treated, it still may not work. If you treat a woman like a schmuck then you deserve to me kicked to the curb, but sometimes it can work both ways. As a result of this marriage, I have never even considered marrying again, as I do not know what to do to make a marriage work. I hope the rest of you are doing better and God Bless. Votes: +6

Everything in here also applies to why a man should dump a women. And I do mean everything. Votes: +8

As a woman, I can relate this article to the mindset I was in 10 years ago when I went through divorce of my first marriage. I rushed into a decision as I felt like I was the princess of the world who deserved a fairytale prince. My first husband was not a prince, but a real, principled, hard working man who had his share of faults. After reality sank in, I spent much of my youth regretting my foolhardiness. Now I am blissfully married again, and I will not lose my husband for my life. I am now mature enough to understand life is not perfect, but it is better to be content with what you have than to live in solitude with no one to care for you Votes: +4

You guys are all so silly. I couldn't understand why this got such HORRIBLE reviews. I seriously think most people need therapy and medication. If you get this worked up b/c someone says if he doesn't support your career, he verbally abuses you, isolates you from your family and friends, then it's time to move on - I would hate to see how you act when something really bad happens. The article is correct, those are RED FLAGS - that's what it said. Do you know when red flags happen? In the beginning. So, women who are so MAD that this article is saying to leave your husband - wow, you really add your own stuff to an article just so you can be mad about nothing. To all the 14 year old boys posing as men - if you think this is how all women act, eh hem, well, I think you need some help. If all the men I know are dogs, I think that says a LOT more about me, than men. Issues much everyone? Find something to really get upset about - this is normal advice. Wise even. If you married a man that it took 15 years for you to whip into shape, good for you. I think it's better to just get along with someone without having to change them. Sad, a lot more fun to be w/someone that is just themselves instead of who you made them into - the "now" perfect man that women would die for. give me a break!!! Votes: +1

Where are the other three? Votes: +0

what are the four things that MEN need to be aware of too get rid of their girlfriends or wife. There are two sides to every story. Votes: +2

As you can tell this article is probably written by a modern day liberated one way woman, of its all about me. "Treat me like the princess I THINK I am". Yet this type of women does not want to work on the relationship, only what she can get out of it. She probably doesn't know how to cook, do laundry, keep a budget, or any clue as to developing a meaningful relationship. But she probably knows how to "apply the makeup", to cover up what she really looks like, put on a padded bra to make her boobs, spill over her bra,and make he appear to be larger, so she can wear low
cut blouses, and then get upset because men look, squeeze into a tight fitting girdle, to compress the belly fat, and then suck it in to wear a tight fitting pair of jeans. Where are all the real women at. I am so glad I have been married to a women for 17 years, that is independent, career woman, self confident, and knows how to cook, laundry, keep a budget, and is willing to work with a partner who is willing to do what needs to be done to keep her woman happy. Articles such as this, is what is driving the percentage of women who are lesbian. Come on girls get a grip. Votes: +2

According to #1, "supportive" means the woman can do anything she wants, plan only for herself, and demand anything she thinks she needs from the man, on her schedule, without consequence.

Guaranteed ladies, if you apply this one as written, you will either end up with a doormat of a man whom you will later lose interest in, or be alone forever, building an ever-intensifying "me" wall around yourself as you age.

Marriage in particular is where you both trade away some of the "me" and replace it with the "us." If you can't fathom doing that, don't waste a good man's time. Once kids enter the picture, the two "you's" will be an even smaller part of the "us" that is a real family. Learn important things from people who have been married a long time please. Votes: +6

Although I agree that the "relationship" your boyfriend (or girlfriend) has with your friends is a good barometer. The idea that he should be dumped because he doesn't get along with your friends a*sumes one big item - that YOUR friends are all wonderful people. Maybe they aren't?

I say that from personal experience. I had a short relationship once with a woman who's friends I frankly didn't like. They seemed to be a 40 year old version of the "junior high mean girls". They were petty and self absorbed. I was a bit surprised the lady I was [trying] to date had such close friends like that, because she didn't seem to exhibit any of those traits. After the 3rd dinner party of snotty, condescending comments about other people not at the table, I told her, "Sorry to tell you, but I don't like your friends. I believe you can find a fundamentally better cla*s of people to be around." It cost me that relationship. But I am not sorry. Our friends say a lot about us, and her friends said a lot about her.

The lesson: that whole "friends" thing cuts both ways. Votes: +6

I believe Brianna had it right. You must love the person your with, be yourself, for that is the person they what to be with. Understanding and affection,Honesty goes along way in a marriage or Relationship. , and sometimes you have to give 60% or even 70% more. But if that person is true, it comes back to you twice fold later on. Votes: +0

article sounds like it was written by one of those undesireable women who has had "problems with men" and cant figure out why. let me give you my 4 reasons for dumping women...

1. she treats you like a overgrown boy who is helpless and needs a mommy:
most men do NOT find bossy,overbearing or dominating women to be sexy or
enjoyable. you can be a mommy when you have kids,ok? I already have one.

2. she has a runaway princess complex: "all men should love me and give me
whatever I want,just like my daddy did. if he isnt willing to make me
the center of his universe,then he doesnt love me."

3. she is just with you for your money,or what you can do for her: a real
relationship is based on sharing and helping each other. each pesron has
equal value and opinion. if you go on a date and you notice her looking
at your clothes,shoes,or car,then claim a mans personality is the most
important dating criteria...run. she is not being honest,and she will
likely grow bored with you later. some women are always looking to trade
up...

4. she uses sex as leverage,or as a weapon: dont give me that crap about
relationships being mostly about companionship. guys can get all of that
they want from family,pets,and best buddies. the difference is,we dont
want sex from pets,family,or best buddies. so,if you dont really care
about sex,leave men alone,and go get some cats. ive been told that cats
make great companions... Votes: +9

My wife and I have been married for 38 years. We're not perfect but both of us appreciate each other. One word of advice for both sexes: Don't do CAN - critize, argue, or nag. Do PAC - praise, agree, and compliment. Also, always follow this sage advice: Before you marry keep both eyes open, after you marry keep one eye closed. You don't ignore serious issues, but you also don't dwell on the insignificant. :-) Votes: +1

just an observation-guys-if you don't like the site, don't read it. If you don't like american women, well-that's your right; and the feeling is probably mutual. If there's problems in a relationship (minus violence, etc), it's not your problem-back away; it's between him and her only, not the world. Votes: -3

this article was written by a bunch of self righteous c**ts or lesbians 1 or the 2 or both. Votes: -3

Item number 4 is the heart of what is wrong with many women today. Here is a clue for women: your friends are part of the reason why you don't have a lasting relationship or are divorced.

Your family and especially your friends need to be a distant third behind your husband and kids. Period, end of story. Especially your single, unhappily married, or cheating girlfriends that want to drag you away from your family and into their circles.

Second piece of advice: your kids need you more than they need their father, baby sitter, friends, or anything else. Put your friends and social life on hold and you will have a much better outcome in terms of how your children behave and what kind of people they grow up to be.

Lastly, don't let anyone fool you. Men are in it for the sex above EVERYTHING else. If you don't like sex or think it ranks below your friends or anything else, don't get married because your husband will be miserable.

More sex = happy husband = makes every other part of your relationship that much better. Votes: +4

Wow, it's attitudes like the author's that is to blame partly for the failure of marriages. I'm just surprised that the website allowed this woman to say some of things she said. I know not all women think like this thankfully. I just wonder if she's ever had a lasting relationship. Votes: +0

Here's some advice for the men.

1. Swear off dating. Work for a living instead, and if you are out of work, look for a job. Your job and your living and your income are far more important, anyway. Remember, in the end, you still sleep with yourself, even if there's another body in bed with you. That "other body" can still dump you, get up, and leave. Do not give her the chance; swear off dating and relationships FIRST.

2. Build real relationships as friendships with Almighty God first, then members of your church, then your co-workers, then with your club members. These are the beings that can help you get along in life. A brother is born for adversity, and there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother.

3. Turn off the XXX video and put down the masturbation toy. These are time wasters. Get involved and do something constructive instead.

4. Let this be your motto: Defecate, or vacate. This is also known as "fish or cut bait." Don't waste your time with fruitless pursuits, and don't waste yourself on people who don't want you or what you have to offer. Also, don't be "polite." BE DIRECT AND FIRM, NO NONSENSE!!

5. If that woman with whom you have sex wants to abort your baby, do not have sex with her. Show her the door. Make sure she crosses it.

6. Mostly, do not touch any woman who is not a member of your own family except as business allows. If your work requires you to touch a woman and you are on duty, then touch her exactly as the work requires and make sure others are there to witness.

Biggest of all, remember, a woman can damage your household, your body, your career, and your life! While preserving the rights of a woman, make sure you work toward preserving your own rights and keep your hands -- and your LIFE -- to yourself!!




Sincerely,


Richard C. August Votes: +5

1. if you read this and every thing on here he does ..... start looking at yourself (((YOUR A DOORMAT)))
2. EVERYONE has up and downs
3. I bet the woman that wrote this hasn't had sex in about 100 years.
thx for you time Votes: +3

This ridiculous article, is a testament to how bad family values are in today's society. Many years ago, articles like this wouldn't have existed, because women knew their roles and their responsibilities. Today, those roles are undefined and ever-changing, as women continue to think of reasons not to take on their moral duties as mothers and homemakers. Us men are partially to blame for what has happened to modern society, we started by giving women the right to vote, since then, all hell has broken loose! Next thing you know, women wanted to work and have the same rights as men. But why should they? They didn't earn anything! This world was founded by and created by a man, women just came along for the ride. Today's society makes me sick to my stomach, values no longer exist and children grow up confused, because usually they are shipped off to daycare because the mother has neglected her responsibilities in favor of pursuing a career. We, as men, have to start holding women accountable, instead of letting them turn the tables on us as if we're the problem! I see far too many men bend over backwards for a woman, only to get screwed like a virgin on prom night. It is undisputed fact that Western women are the most egotistical, spoiled, materialist and shallow women in the world. If you want a real woman, you need to find one who places the importance of family above everything else.

If you've got a woman who wants to work and have a career, you're asking for trouble, because if she wants a career, chances are, she wants everything else you will give her, the children will be left in a strangers hands and dinner won't be waiting for you after a hard day of work. When you first meet a woman, tell her what you expect from her, if she doesn't want to jump on board, then you dump her, and fast! This problem isn't as prevalent in Asian culture, because most Asian women are raised to be wives and serve their husbands. It should be no different for women anywhere in the world, but unfortunately it is, especially here in America, that's why I'm married to an Asian woman now. They aren't brainwashed by the liberal media or by these ridiculous articles and TV shows. I explained to her when we first met, that she wasn't allowed to work and her duties were to have and raise children, and look after the home. Guess what her response was? "Of course I will do that, its my obligation", and 5 years later it's still golden, this after 2 failed marriages to selfish American and British women. How insane is it, that when a divorce is finalized, the woman usually gets everything, and she didn't earn any of it? How is that fair? That is very irresponsible, especially from an accountability standpoint. Its akin to the welfare recipient who wont bother to look for work, because he knows he will get a government check every month. More men need to stand up and speak out against these injustices and atrocities in today's society, because if you don't, it will only get worse! Speak up fellas and stand your ground, don't settle for bronze when you can have gold! Votes: +3

Another anti-husband bias piece.

Guys, if a woman shows signs of thinking like these 'net writers, dump her! If you fall in with her, she will make your daily life miserable and eventually drag you to court on a charge of failing to be female. Smarter yet, only date women who did not grow up in America. Or only American women who laugh out loud at these puff pieces for the deservedly frustrated. Votes: +5

This is a bunch of garba... there are hard working man out there.. supportive i would say or too suportive, we have been brianwash that it is ok to fool around.. cheat deceive... that get a bad deal at the end, as long as he doesn't know it is all ok... this article should be of she not he. one thing that isd common is deny deny deny... even thought you are caught... deny deny deny. too much trash on tv. Votes: +1

American woman...Momma let me be..e.....American women don't come around knocking at my door. Don't want to see you face no more...... Votes: +5

Article=Stupid

There is no such thing as a perfect man. Bottom line....weigh the good with the bad.

Most of these things are not definite rule brakers or run signs....
The ONLY thing I can think of is if a man has a habitual problem that impacts the family. Beating, multiple cheating episodes.....What I find funny that is not in here is a drunk or gambler....Really?? Because my list of people I would not be with are anyone who drinks alcohol or gambles. If he cheated on my once, I could forgive....constantly...NO. I am just saying....we all have our own list. Women...Stick to your personal list....it is much better than anything someone would write. Votes: -1

If you are one of the selfish women mentioned in this article, do not get married. You already fail the test of commitment. Marriage is the dissolution of self into the combination of the two. If you want your date night, your own money, your own time, then you should be on your own. Don't drag someone else down with you. Votes: +3

Real relationships are about sacrifice & they are always a work in progress. Seems like woman are so concerned about men cheating, they forget how the relationship with the guy they love formed. When it comes down to it, relationships break down from a lack of communication. Woman can treat a man like dirt, talk about him, use sex as a bargaining chip, yet, when the relationship comes close to end, they will stand up & say, "I never cheated".... You can't stop a person from cheating on you, so going through his or her stuff will only prolong finding out what's true & what's true is their is a lack of communication within the relationship... Focus on being the best spouse you can be, whatever is done in the dark will eventually make it's way to the light. If you search his or her things & find some information that he or she has been cheating, the relationship should be over correct. But if you search his or her things & find nothing, shouldn't the relationship be over as well..!! There is still a lack of trust & communication within that relationship.. Votes: -1

Wow, I really do not believe that cheating belongs on the same list as abuse and stealing--unless you are referring to habitual cheating. Do you honestly believe that you are going to be married to the same man for fifty years and never have to forgive him for a single mistake? Votes: +0

This article saddens me. My wife and I were both married in our forties, now celebrating 7 years. It was first marriage for both of us. It either of us were to put stock in this article about the other, we should surely divorce.

I am sad because impressionable your women, or men, who would base a decision on such a set of rules is likely to find themselves alone for a lifetime. That is not a bad thing, if that is the choice that is wanted. But if a chance at companionship and love was pa*sed up based on an unattainable set of rules, that would be unfortunate.

As mentioned in previous posts - abuse, adultery, addiction - those are serious problems. But, guess what, maybe one person pays more bills and the other does more housework. Guess what, that's called a compromise - every good marriage has it. The married folk out there reading this can attest to it.

To the single folks out there - here's less exciting piece of advise that doesn't make a very interesting article. Use your common sense. If perfection is your target, make sure you bring what you seek, because if you find that person, that's what they'll be looking for, too. If your common sense tells you that this is a person you can love AND trust, you may be onto something. Don't ignore that voice. Votes: +0

My wife of 20+ years is guilty of all 4 of these traits on a regular basis. The longer we stay together, the worse it gets. Should I dump her? Votes: +2

My wife has been every one of these issues and more, and so have most of the women i have dated before her. Im 5'8", 200 and she is 5'4", 110 and has been physically, verbally, emotionally and spiritually abusive not only to me but to our 2 year old and 10 month old boys. Every time i see stories or hear stories like this that make women out to be delicate innocent victims, i want to shut the mouth of the author or speaker. My wife grew up in a life of privalege to an amry officer/surgeon and currently practicing physician, having anything she wants whenever she wants without any regards to those that are affected by her demands. If she doesnt get her way she is physically, verbally and emotionally abusive and manipulative, especially if she is confronted or questioned, mainly to me but is verbally and emotionally to our kids as well. She does nothing around the house; no laundry, dishes, cleaning, vacuuming, yardwork etc.., but complains when things do not get done. I work afternoons full time as a therapist at a hospital and go to school full time during the day after taking the kids to day care in the morning and when i get home, I am the one who does all these things while getting only 2 to 3 hours of sleep a day. I am a veteran of the army, a physically, mentally and emotionally strong person and could easily hurt her but dare not because I was raised to respect others, especially women, but practically all the women that I know whether in the hospital, family or friends are of the mindset that the world owes them and that they are goddesses who can do no wrong and treat everyone anyway they want. Its stories like this that make women more fu88ed up when it comes to relationships and what it means to be in one, especially when they get together and talk. To the author, Shut the F**k up. Votes: +5

the 4 reasons in the article defintely apply to anyone of either gender and in same gender as well as hetero partnerships. No one wants to to be mistreated. But to post on here that all women act this way (and men don;t )is ridiculous. Good luck finding a woman from ANY coutry who'd marry you with that attitude. To me it is also telling that more women are opting out of marriage - particularly 2nd marriages. We can find grooms overseas too yanno....but there are issues with those types of relationships as well. it is silly to claim them as a panacea, although I have seen some work fairly well....now & then. Votes: -5

Most of you sound like you need daily therapy. Good Luck. Votes: +1

Whoever wrote this article should grow the hell up. Votes: +4

If I were a woman I would be embarra*sed by this article. This is what many women do and than rationalize that their logic and behavior is correct. American women have reached a point where they are doing serious damage to our society. And yet they claim to continue to be oppressed.
I read this article and thank God for my Chinese wife. Votes: +6

Jeez...four very good reasons why I have remained single for 20 years. American women are so unhappy and they do not understand the reasons for their unhappiness. Maybe they should stop trying to live like New York City liberal writers say they should live and start living a life focused on sharing their life with someone. Why would I want to share my life with a woman who is looking for reasons to "kick me to the curb?" I stopped dating American women long ago because of this kind of baloney. I enjoy dating Eastern European and Asian women. Sure, it costs to fly to their country, but I spend two weeks in heaven every six months. Today, I have nothing but contempt for the American woman. Votes: +8

This article is dead on. Especially the deal breakers listed at the end. I'm in a relationship with a wonderful man who does none of these things. Ladies, hang in there, there are good men out there!! Votes: -3

I think most women are too intelligent to follow the recommendation of this article. Relationships take 2 and sometimes it is far from 50/50. I tried to split for some of these reasons 35 years ago, but losing her would have been a mistake. You simply cannot make relationship decisions based on the few criteria listed here. Use your intelligence. Think through situations. Wait a few weeks before making any drastic decision. You could be amazed at how time changes our perspective. Votes: +0

Love is about self sacrifice. You literally lay down your life for the one you love. You make their happiness a priority. Its not about you. If you really love someone, you will understand. Notice I did not say LUST mistaken for love. If you really love someone, you will understand. You put thier needs above your own. Votes: +1

Why is this article so sexist against men? Men need the same things from a woman in a relationship, but in our society, men are expected to be caretakers and daddys to women and at the exact same time as lovers and cheerleaders for the woman. This article encourages women to treat men like garbage or disposables- Just "dump him", they say, if he doesn't cater to how you are trying to mold him. Ironically, I constantly hear from women who are happy with their boyfriend that "He loves me for me, for who I am". Seems that women don't believe that love, empathy, connection, acceptance and investment in a person is a two-way street. Votes: +5

They should rename this article, "How to stay single for the rest of your life." What a horrible article... Votes: +6

First off everyone, this article isn't that good or bad.I was in a bad relationship like that.I wish I could have known the warnings when I was first dating (I was too blinded by love later). I didn't see until too late. He had quite a few small red flags but was good at hiding how he really is. He wasn't physically abusive, didn't start off abusive. We got married, then he got worse. It was slowly progressing(its harder to notice that way, then one day you look around and wonder WTF happened O_o like a boiled lobster). I was working and he could never keep a job, but at first I made enough money so he didn't have to(I was in the army).Then later I got out of the army (he wanted me to get out)and stopped making as much, so we both had to work. Thats when things really went downhill. I wanted to make it work because I loved him. In the end I was the one who had to change and put up with everything to keep it going. I did everything I could. He became emotionally abusive and verbally. But I loved him (love makes you stupid -_-').He had been lying to and using me the entire time. When it finally ended he had destroyed my self esteem and confidence, isolated me from family and friends(because he didn't like them and we moved where he wanted to, near his family), ruined my credit and took everything. I am just very thankful we didn't have kids. Why is it when an article like this comes out you hear these comments "Her reckless spending, years with sex unless a transaction is involved? Verbal abuse?
I guess I am not being supportive, not allowing her to be herself.
Everything you described is the way women treat men as a DEFAULT. " Men can be like that too. My Husband was alot like that( yes even the sex part). It is not DEFAULT for a woman to treat men like that. I have never treated anyone like that and would never.People are different, you should not judge all women like that. I don't judge all men.

"Read this article and change the words He to She and you will have a VERY accurate picture of how most American women behave in a 'relationship'. No wonder more and more men marry women from other countries." Thank you for not saying ALL American women at least. I am an American woman. I am not like that. And again, there are some men out there like that too. The article is only about some men, not all.

My point is there are guys like this out there(and women too) and I'm sick of comments about how all women (or American women) are like this. And these warnings may seem stupid to some but there are users out there and some are good at hiding it (MEN AND WOMEN). Little things that don't seem that bad when dating can sometimes turn into things much worse. I am now very happily single, but just because a user tricked me once does not mean I'm going to treat all men like they are the same or go along with judging all of them by the stereotypes about them. Votes: +1

This is hilarious, the article is about dating, not marriage. It's called 4 reasons to dump him, not 4 reasons to divorce him... And as far as the content of the article... duh. If your boyfriend spends all day at the coffee shop while you're working, it's time to move on. Thank you Dr. Phil... Votes: +1

This article is meant for entertainment purposes only. There is no name of an author listed anywhere that I can find, and there are no citations in the article anywhere. Thus, the information in the article was not gathered from any sort of scientific, research, or psychology journal articles. The authors opinions are written as if they were facts, but without any references whatsoever, these are just the opinions of a ghost writer. Anytime you read any sort of article in an entertainment type of magazine, you need to take what you are reading with a grain of salt. Unless something is cited, quoted, or referenced from a peer-reviewed professional journal or scientific research journal, peer-reviewed, published article, or published book, you should not consider the reading as fact. This is some sort of women's health and beauty magazine, thus it is printed for women's reading pleasure and entertainment. People should remember that just because something is in print does not make it true. Similarly, just because you hear something on a television cable news program, that does not make the information true either. Media is always biased. Always remember that and try not to get so worked up about a silly little relationship article that was clearly written for the small target audience of young single career women in the early to mid-twenties. This article was not written for men, homemakers, senior citizens, married people, middle-aged women, teenagers or children. There is no reason for anyone to be upset about such a lighthearted topic. We have serious problems going on in this country my friends, like people blowing each away with guns every single day because they got their feelings hurt... Votes: +3

You forgot another one: if he forgets to wipe his feet before entering the house.

Seriously, any writer who tells someone not to forgive someone else for trivial things, is a menace to civilized society. Votes: +9

Utterly shallow, imbecilic feminazi, libtard garbage. No one should listen to any advice from outsiders, particularly unsolicited advice from pop airheads. Votes: +3

plz. i just finally dumped a homeless woman i took in over 18 months ago and gave every chance to turn her life around while she took the same free ride you are talking about @ my expense. what a sexist article written by a newles. most ppl on the internet are too savvy nowadays to be taken in by such journalistic phail.
but i sure couldn't resist the headline =P Votes: +3

When women stop believing that god is a human male...human males will stop acting like god. Votes: -3

I'll just echo the sentiments of all those (many, many) folks who found this article profoundly ridiculous. Who does this "writer" think she is? Jesus. Votes: +3

This is absolutely right. No one should put up with any type of mistreatment
from someone they are supposed to be in a relationship. I might not worry
much about him/her not liking your family. Friends of yours he /she should be
respectful of and always friendly. Family is a different story. My In-Laws hated
me yet, I have given my Wife 41+ years a loving secure marriage. I turned out
not to be the "Yankee" scum her clan thought I was. Everyone else has been
divorced and "on the rolls" as they say. We are committed to each other and
no one else. Votes: +0

Jeez, however wrote this is a man hater.
1. If he doesnt like your friends who cares. if your looking for a man and your girlfriends are more important to you than he, well theres nothing wrong with him there is something wrong with you. if the tables were turned we would hear the end of it would we? "why are you spending time with the guys watching the game"

to the woman who wrote this. Sweetheart, if your spending too much time at work, theres something wrong, you should want to be around your partner more than at your job. It doesnt sound like you want a relationship. you want a friend.

Regardless of what time we live in, men are men and women are women. Men take care of the women, and vice versa, Men are strong hard working and gentle at home, women are gentle and nurturing. it these roles are not being considered relationships fail. women think that their guy isnt "Man enough" and when the woman works or isnt submissive the man will go and find a woman is submissive and nurturing not one who works a job all day. why are you trying to re invent the wheel? Votes: +3

I kind of have a problem with these. First of all, the second there are children involved (and unless I am mistaken there is no disclaimer anywhere in the article) all of these rules are thrown out the window. Although, over time, any one of them could end up being an issue. There was a person on the first page of comments who mentions this: Reasons for divorce; Adultery, Abuse, Addiction. Well, I don't agree with the addiction part either. I am bi-polar and am in recovery from a pain killer addiction. It was pretty intense. I was taking about 50 double strength Norcos a day (the equivalent of 100 regular vicodin). Not, I take Subutex and because of the bi-polar I am on it every day. Maybe forever. Now, sometimes I even have a "fall of the wagon" moment where I take too many because the bi-polar makes me not sleep and I run out a day or two before the refill. Well, that makes me up and down a lot. My fiancee (and mother of my 6 1/2 year old) is the main bread winner. It's not that I am not a hard worker, I am a very hard worker. My bi-polar made it to where I had to quit a couple of jobs ( I probably would have been fired eventually) and the most recent was last fall. I immediately checked into the mental hospital for 2 months. I have not worked since, but not from lack of effort. I have applied to over 200 positions in the last 3 months but man it's rough in the job market. It makes me feel like a piece of s**t to see the "Freeloader" part of the article because YES, there are days where I don't want to go on Indeed.com and apply for jobs. I sleep. Now, I am mister Mom and walk our daughter to school, pick her up, clean, cook, etc. every single day. But, I am the man of the house and I wish things were different. Especially with addiction being the main issue as to why I am where I am today, it is hard to stomach (although the bi-polar IS intense and not necessarily my fault). So, the addiction thing isn't always a deal breaker. I never was physically abusive, even during the throes of my addiction I was still a pretty good father. I just needed a lot of help from family on the bad days or the withdrawl days. But please, don't be irresponsible. I love my fiancee (we will get married when I fell like the man she deserves, by the way, she is definitely worth it and I haven't even thought of being without her for over 7 years). Don't go making out of work men, and comment folks, people with addiction struggles out to be worthless pieces of s**t. Especially those who have actually gone (I see my addiction/pysch doctor every 28 days) to get help and are trying. Votes: +0

What?...was this for high school girls? I wonder how many times this same article has been written and rewritten over the years. I'm a man who isn't in the habit of reading women's magazines and even I've seen this same generic article several times in my life. There are plenty of centered, secure women out there, ranging from corporate executives to housewives, and one of the things these women don't do is take this sort of tripe seriously. Votes: +0

I wonder if this site thinks that women who don't pay their own way in a relationship and rely on their boyfriends are also users? Or do they only label men that way? Votes: +5

I put this as a one star, I do believe this is good information, however, it should be written from a anyone point of view. I've seen this happen to friends and had it happen to me. By all means put this information out there and i hope it inspires many, many people into changing their lives if they are in this situation. BUT women are just as capable of doing this, and NO-ONE deserves this. Votes: +2

Was this article written by Sandra Fluke? It would explain alot if it were. Women's lib was a very valid movement and in some cases is still today. But the above article is a great example of just how far out they are getting. Take care of EACH OTHER, put God in the center of your relationship and I promise you will have the most amazing marriage ever. For my wife and I it gets better every year. Votes: +0

It's rubbish like this that has everybody confused, both male and female. "Don't change who you are, he needs to accept you for who you are" in one sentence, but "don't blindside him, talk about it and give him a chance to change"... Which is it? Fair is fair, is it not? Votes: +1

Men want sex and dinner on the table.

Women want.. Well, they don't know what they want. They have to copy other women. Watch Sex and the City. Girls making $600 a week, living on Park Avenue. Yeah, fantasy. And, Ann Landers is still selling the idea that women's privates shouldn't be given away, which kinda makes them what? Votes: +2

This author is breath-takingly short on wisdom/insight and the complexities of current and future relationships that go beyond "the woman" being given advice in this article and her man. For all those who blindly follow this author's advice, may you reap what you sow in kind. And, when you find that you've damaged far more than the man and yourself, you can look back and work mightily to justify your choice--that your own happiness was paramount and other's matter far less than self. Judge...or forgive. I choose to forgive, to be patient, to be kind. It preserves society now and for generations to come. Votes: +1

This is such a pathetic article. My suggestion? Keep "your man" and DUMP the author of this article. Isn't it interesting that no one put a name on this article. But, then again, who would actually claim it? Votes: +0

Ok, so what if your husband of thirty years doesn't have any of the bad traits above. In other words, he is supportive, does want I want, supports me and our family, loves my extended family, has self-control, still a great father, home every night, doesn't work late, does housework, cleans up after me and himself, etc. etc. etc. BUT, and this is a big but, he is asexual, in other words no interest in sex. Mind you, he is not unfaithful . .I know that for a fact, just take my word on that, but he has no interest in an intimate relationship (and quite honestly I found over 50,000 people have joined a support group for asexuals, so this isn't all that uncommon in spite of what our culture may tell you) . . so is this a reason to break up the marriage after thirty years . . we're in our early sixties. Now mind you I'm not perfect, so don't a*sume that. However, I sould be very interested in your responses to this. Thanks. Votes: +2

Wow...sounds like someone forgot their Pamprin this morning.

Normally I support feminism and the belief of a woman's natural superiority over men, but this article went too far in that arena. It sounds as if ALL men are this way, but I can tell you in innumeral ways how women are so much worse, and yet we can get away with it. We need to go easy on them, because without men, we are only wo. Votes: +2

What ever happened to: Four reasons to keep him? I've been married to the same woman for 24 years. I chose her, she chose me. It was a mutual agreement. It had nothing to do with money or property or a*sistance. It was about love. It is still about love. So, here's my four thoughts on reasons to keep the man YOU chose too.

1. He works hard to deal with your monthly emotional rollercoasters
2. He keeps coming back after you tell him he sucks, every 28 days
3. He picked you out of hundreds of choices he has met over the years
4. You made the choice to be with him in the first place, so be happy with your choice! Remember? It's a two way street.
5. You talk of equality in life, why not behave that way and forgive him as often as he is required to forgive you, every 28 days?

That's five simple reasons to keep the man who you chose. Do you need more or would you prefer to dwell on the negative side of journalism just to get more ad sales? You, writer, are a pandering fool who most likely can't keep a relationship even when they pay you to be with them. Votes: +4

This was excellent advice for men. For decades, all these issues are what men had to endure, from being treated like a two-legged bank account to a work horse laboring for the benefit of wives/girlfriends. As such, men today should not marry. They should demand a 50-50 relationship. Men should no longer pay for meals, but demand women always pay half. Women should buy their own cars. Women should earn 50% of any houses purchased, OR not get their names on the deed. It's time men made women carry their full share. Otherwise...DUMP HER. Votes: +6

1) isn't supportive, won't help around the house
AKA: dump him if he won't take orders. Dump him if he has any wants of his own. The only wants that are important are yours, and he should jump to to fulfil them, whether its a sympathetic ear or a vacuuming.
2) Won't put up with you being a b***h
Being in a relationship means that you don't need to behave yourself or have any consideration for your partner. You should not have to put on a "front" like acting with common courtesy.
3) Users
Haw haw haw! If you have sex with a manw***e, remember to stay within your budget.
4) Your friends
Remember, keeping a claque of single girl friends who undermine every relationship you have is more important than any relationship. Especially when they usually only last a month or two. For some reason. If a man calls them out on it, dump him - not them. Votes: +3

So, "The modern woman expects..." Blah, Blah, Blah! The modern American woman is self centered, spoiled and a complainer about everything a man represents. Men are tired of the selfish attitude of "what have you done for ME?" and "You're not worthy of a relationship with me".
Well, who needs your pms emotional rants, your fingerpointing and your femdom, feminist attitude! Votes: +5

Or, if he's a whiny child who always wants to have his way (like the first few men who commented on this thread), then throws a tantrum if he doesn't, DUMP HIM. Votes: -4

This articule is full of it. Most American woman I know are free loaders and expect you to do everything after get off work as well. That why I got married to a Korean beautiful, smart, funny, fit, works if need be, and helps around the house. I have dated many woman in the U.S. I had to dump everyone after 2 weeks to 2 month(some were stalkers). So, don't give me this bs that is why 1/3 of the US fat most are woman. Votes: +6

You could be arrogant in writing this. People like you could be saddist and I can bet, if woman follow you, there will be no one married and it seems thats what you wanted.

Men follow the tradition and you seems, want to break it, no men will marry any woman if she is arrogant and wont beg any woman who is dumping them and pretty sure he can live alone and die alone. Votes: +2

Women, take this kind of unforgiving attitude towards your man and you can expect to raise your children as a single mom, alone, and become old living with a bunch of cats. Try being supportive, loving, and understanding to your man (same for women) and you'll keep your partner. Votes: +4

And remember ladies, these same rules apply to dumping you!

If you can't get along with HIS family or friends...
If you can't be support of him, his goals, his beliefs...
If you can't stop pushing him to make changes...
If he can't be himself around you...

Guys, it's time to dump that Gal! Votes: +7

Avoid the drama get to know your your future spouse before getting physical. Let's get physical.... Votes: +1

After 15 years of marriage I asked for a divorce. Most of these points applied to HER. Votes: +3

What an absolute trash heap of an article--arrogant, ignorant and strident in its "dump him," mantra, with some valid reasons mixed in with dubious absolutes about "cheating" and other supposed crimes that are more complicated between two people than the dullard who churned out this mess could ever grasp. Do we all really need more self-indulgent drivel for and about women? I am embarra*sed for the author (using the term loosely), the site and everyone subjected to it Votes: +4

Worst article ever. Relationships are much more complicated than a simple checklist. TO think someone might actually read this and take your advice rather than trying to work things out. DO everyone a favor and never write another thing in your entire life. Votes: +2

OOOOOOOOKKKKKKK!!!!! However, it will be fair to reciprocate these as "reasons to dump her as well". Most modern women violate most if not all of these "rules". Or is hiprocracy the new "equality" women strive for? Votes: +3

Thankyou, thankyou, thankyou. These descriptions fit my wife to a T. I will call a divorce lawyer Monday (for reals). I found a nice team of women divorce lawyers (they are meaner). Votes: +3

modern women are having a COLLECTIVE MANIC EPISODE.... imo of course. One day they'll realize what they gave up...men who actuially treeated them like women not she-men who want to be men. Strangely, now that women are so manly, they are rating themselves as less happy now than most other times in history, yet they are more powerful and liberated then ever. Wonder why that is? Votes: +0

Any woman who read this article probably does not have boyfriend problems............... Votes: +0

Unforgivable? What a crock! No wonder the divorce rate is so high in America! This article is written as if women never make these same mistakes with men.

I got so fed up with American women I married a foreigner. Best decision I've ever made. My Filipina knows how to love a man. Consequently, I treat her like a princess and she's extremely happy (she considers the best man she's ever met). American woman are the worst in the world. Votes: +3

So let me get this strait, my husband defended my honor to my father when he insulted me in my own home, BUT because they can't get along, I am supposed to side with my father over my husband and leave him? Yeah, that is not happening. There are a lot of times more things going on then can be just cut and dry. Some people like me have problems with one or both parents finding fault with everything they do, and until they find the RIGHT partner, never have any help or support in dealing with them. You also have those parents with the *No one is good enough for MY child* complex, and no matter what he does for them, or how nice he is, they will NEVER like or accept him. But according to this that's HIS fault? Please do better research before printing such nonsense and drivel in the future. Perhaps you would sound like less of an idiot. Votes: +2

He doesn't get along with a family that is racist, biggots, only cares about money, status & etc. Yep, I got dumped, gladly Votes: +0

this is exactly why i left my wife, so this goes for men as well as women!!! most everything on this list was my ex.
Votes: +2

if she refuses to swallow early in the relationship DEFINITELY DUMP HER.
That's all from the guy's side.. Votes: +2

The comments are wiser than the article. But then what does one expect from an essay without an author? Where is the byline? Votes: +0

This article is kinda BS!!!! My husband and I have been together for ten years and married for four years...I don't get along with his family and doesnt get along with mine! That doesn't mean we should brake up. We have four kids together and our families just have issues that we are putting our life together first instead of letting them be part of our decision making process. We still see our families it's just that we had to let both our families know this is what is and you can either get on the train or get off the tracks. If you need to read an article on if you should dump someone or not you need help!!! Votes: +0

What a miserable little pile. Such cretinous drivel could easily have been constructed as a "dump her" article, but it would never make it to publication. How many young women are being poisoned by entitled, relationship-crushing "journalism?" The author is chucklehead, the editors are arrogant fools. Votes: +0

Wow, talk about being self indulgent, self centered and selfish! Who gave you license to print such trash? Go back to yahoo... Votes: +2

As a old man, a father of a young and ambitious daughter, who wants her to have access to every door, that any man can open, this advice is plain wrong. It's immature and damaging. First, only good looking and young women can get away with dumping their men. They will find older, richer men who will put up with them for a while. If the dumping continues, these females are being left increasingly alone...fading old beauties. Possibly well educated, employed, but alone on holidays and in life.

In dumping, you will play to men's weaknesses and devalue your strengths. Instead, put your reasoning and persuasion strengths to work. Work with men in simple terms. Guide them along a simple task and reward path. You will build nurturing and healthy relationships. Neither looks nor age will erode love.

Take it from an old man. This is a better path to warmth, love, and companionship. Put your strength to work. Votes: +2

Which is why I choose to stay single. I could list 40 reasons to "Dump Her:. :) Votes: +2